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Doctor Jokes !

Elephant Jokes:

What weighs 5,000 lbs and wears glass slippers?

Cinderelephant

What has 6 legs, 3 ears, 4 tusks, and 2 trunks?

An Elephant with spare parts

What is large and gray and goes around and around in circles?

An Elephant struch in a revoilving door

What do elephants do for laughs?

They tell people jokes

What game do elephants like to play most?

Squash

What did the cat say to the elephant?

Meow

What did the grape say to the elephant?

Nothing,Grape's can't talk

What's the difference between eating an elephant and eating peanut butter?

Elephant does'nt stick to the roof of ur mouth

Why do elephants wear red toenail polish?

Oops,sorry,no polish jokes allowed

Why do elephants paint their toenails red?

So they can just hide a strawberry patch

Why do elephants hide in strawberry patches?

So they can just jump ot and stomp on people

Why do elephants stomp on people?

They like the suiqish feelings bet'n their toes

How do you stop a charging elephant?

Take away their credit card

How can you tell when an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

Look for the elephant's tracks in the butterTime to get a new car

How can you tell when an elephant is under your bed?

Your nose is squashed against the ceiling

If you see an elephant in your car, what time is it?

Its time to buy new car

What should you do to a blue elephant?

Cheer it up.

What should you do to a green elephant?

Wait untill it gets ripe

Why don't elephants ride bikes?

They don't have a thumb to ring the bell

A little boy is standing at the side of a river, weeping. His tears are streaming down his cheeks. An elderly lady passes by and feels pity for him. 'What is the matter, young boy? Why are you crying?'

'It's mean!', the boy sniffed, 'My daddy drowned all four little puppies we had yesterday!'

'That's awful indeed !', the lady replied angrily,' Your father is a real bastard!'

'Yes', said the little boy, 'He had promised to me that I could do it.'

Birthday joke

It was the kindergarten teachers birthday and the students
decided that they would each buy their teacher a gift.

The first student, whose parents own a florist shop, gave her a
present. She held it and said "I guess that it is flowers". "How
did you guess?" asked the little boy. She laughed and thanked
him.

The second student, whose parents own a candy store, gave her a
present. She held it and said, "I guess that is some candy."

"How did you guess?" asked the little boy. She again laughed and
thanked him also.

The third student, whose parents own a bottle shop, gave her a
box which was leaking.  The teacher touched the liquid with her
finger and tasted it. "Mmmmm is it wine?" she asked.

"No," said the little girl.

So she tasted it again. "Is it champaigne?" she asked.

"No," replied the little girl, "It is a puppy."

Three Little Pigs

A first grade teacher was telling her class about the 3 little
pigs. She got to the part where the pigs get the bulding
materials and said, "The first little pig went up to a man and
asked, 'Excuse me sir, but may I have some straw to build a
house?'"

The teacher wanted to know if the class was paying attention so
she asked, "What do you think the man said?"

One boy raised his hand and said, "I think maybe the man said
something like, 'Holy Shit! A talking pig!'"

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